Rules of Life

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Tommy

Just a Millennial living in the real world...

A goal of mine was to read more books in 2021. I see so many people on Instagram saying that they read a book a month and I’m like how do they do that. But I have read 5 books and listened to 5 books on Audible this year so not quite a book a month, but it’s close. I’m not a huge fan of Audible because I am more of a visual learner and I can comprehend things better visually than listening. But I have been using Audible because it’s easier for my commute in the morning and the monthly membership is reimbursed by the entertainment credit on my AMEX Platinum card.

I’m not a huge reader because reading really drains a lot of energy out of me as I have poor reading comprehension. My lowest score on the ACT back in high school was reading comprehension and I literally scored like an 18. Having a low score on the ACT doesn’t mean that I can’t comprehend reading. It just takes me longer to comprehend things, which is not ideal for the ACT as it’s a timed test. That’s ok as no one is perfect. Over my life, I have improved my reading comprehension greatly and I figured out what works for me.  

So earlier this year I read the 12 Rules of Life by Jordan Peterson because I wanted to see why he was so controversial. I thought the book was great and I see why it was a bestseller and international bestseller. After reading the book, that made me write a Evernote about the rules of life I strive to live by and I wanted to share them.

A lot of these are things that I have learned by living life, reading, or quotes from movies/TV. I am not a perfect person so that’s why I strive to live by them and I think I have done a pretty good job at doing that. Below are my rules of life in no particular order. Feel free to agree or disagree as everyone has an opinion. 

  • Situational Awareness – Dad: I learned this from my Dad and he learned about situational awareness with survival training in the US Navy. Probably my #1 rule of life because you can’t follow these rules of life if you are not alive to live them. You are responsible for taking care of yourself especially when it comes to protecting yourself from physical harm. It’s especially frightening today with the mental health problems and gun problems we have in today’s society as there are definitely crazy people out there. But living in a big city, like Chicago, has toughen me up. Some tips for situational awareness are:
    • Always have an exit strategy, especially at mass gatherings. Know how to escape any situation safely and quickly. 
    • Don’t have your head down glued to your cell phone while walking down the street and walk assertively down the street with your head on a swivel. 
    • Walk in well lit areas with people around: My Dad always quoted “Nothing good happens after midnight.” And for the most part I believe that. Bad things seem to happen in the dark more often than during daytime. I believe 99% of people in the world are good people. People typically act normal in public due to societal norms and would be willing to help out people who are asking for help. Unfortunately, the bystander effect is a real thing. But hopefully in a crowded place, someone would help out.  
    • Never have noise-cancelling mode on when listening in public. 
    • Always check the license plate(s) on ride-sharing vehicles: This story rocked my world when I first heard about it and you should always confirm the car/driver before getting into a stranger’s car. 
    • Never get black out drunk where you can’t get home safely.
  • Treat others how you want to be treated – The Golden Rule: Literally, one of the first things that we all learned when we were children. 
  • Respect others only if they respect you: I think you should always respect people especially elders, but if they don’t respect you then don’t waste your time around them!
  • Everyone is trying to sell you something – Dad: An interesting perspective because I feel that this is so true in life. A car salesman is trying to sell you a car. On a job interview, you are trying to sell yourself for why you would be a great fit for a company. On Tinder, you are selling yourself on why you would be a great match for each other. Even when it comes to friendship, you are selling love and kindness (or hopefully at least) to fulfill your social needs. Everyone is trying to sell you something. 
  • Surround yourself with people more successful and smarter than you. 
  • Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me: I learned this back when I was a kid. Never let words put you down. They are only words and you have to be mentally strong. 
  • Haters will always hate. 
  • “That’s why they make chocolate and vanilla ice cream.” – Grandpa: You always have a choice in the United States. 
  • “If it has 4 wheels and an engine, it will still get you to the place you want to be.” – Grandpa: My Grandpa meant it doesn’t matter what type of car you have. If it has 4 wheels and an engine then it serves the same purpose of your $70,000 Tesla. This quote is the opposite of “Keeping up with the Joneses.” You don’t have to have a flashy car or things to impress people. 
  • It’s far easier to be angry at what you don’t have than being grateful for what you do have. 
  • Keep an open mind, but not so open that your brain falls out. 
  • Reverend King said if you can’t be nonviolent, if you feel that you must fight back, don’t go out, because you will compromise the movement. 
  • Integrity is the courage to do right regardless of the consequences and the inconvenience. 
  • Family isn’t always blood. It’s the people in your life who want you in theirs; the ones who accept you for who you are, the ones who would do anything to see you smile and love you no matter what. 
  • Confidence comes from what you don’t have not gratitude and what you have. Even though gratitude is important too. Become comfortable with your fears. Limiting your fear of the worst possible outcome. Confront your fears. It’s difficult but that is how you become more confident. Practice makes perfect. 
  • Things that are productive other than work/school/chores: Sleeping, being with friends and family, taking a break, taking time to make yourself food to eat, doing things for yourself and not to just please other people, and doing things you want to do, not just things you have to do. 
  • Self-Sabotage: Stop being afraid of what will happen if your ambitions start to take shape. You need a plan for when things go right. Afraid of succeeding will cost them in terms of security and comfort when they do. 
  • Naysayers & Haters: If you have an established group of friends or co-workers, they’ve come to expect certain behaviors and accomplishments from you. If you’ve been around that friend group for years, you feel safe and predictable. When you change your trajectory, it will trigger a host of feelings they may or may not understand as they reflect their own dissatisfactions or lack of momentum. As you make progress, you feel like you’ve become the enemy. That’s not true of course.  

Movie & TV Quotes

  • “Put good out in the world, then good will come back to you.” – Kumiko from Cobra Kai Season 3.  
  • “There’s two roads in life. One is you’re winning or learning. And the other is you are losing all of the way to the f**king grave. Boy, you better choose quickly or life is gonna choose it for you.” – Rip Wheeler from the TV show Yellowstone. 
  • “It’s ok to lose to opponent, but must not lose to fear.” – Mr. Miyagi in the Karate Kid Part III. 
  • “In Japan, you can always visit someone. They speak to us even when they are gone.” – Bartender in Cobra Kai season 3. 
  • “We are living our lives now, not later. Later will be too late.” – Benjamin Sanchis in 100 Foot Wave: Live in the present and not the past or future. 
  • “Never give up, never surrender.” – Jason Nesmith in Galaxy Quest. 

Celebrity Quotes

  • “You miss 100% shots you don’t take.” – Wayne Gretzky. 
  • How to determine if something is worth spending energy on it or not? Ask yourself 3 questions. Can I control it? Can I change it? Can I let go of it? – Nate O’Brien.
  • “You don’t get any extra points for the fact that something’s very hard to do. So you might as well just step over one-foot bars, instead of trying to jump over seven-foot bars.” – Warren Buffett: Work smarter, not harder.
  • “Why refuse to specify? Because while you are failing to define success (and thereby rendering if impossible) you are also refusing to define failure, to yourself, so that if and when you fail you won’t notice, and it won’t hurt. But that won’t work! You cannot be fooled so easily, unless you have gone very far down the road! You will instead carry with you a continual sense of disappointment in your own Being and the self-contempt that comes along with that and the increasing hatred for the world that all of that generates (or degenerates).” – Jordan Peterson in the 12 Rules of Life.
  • “Quit more books. Don’t read something you don’t like. Give a book 10% of the total page length before giving up.” – Mark Manson.  

Inspirational Music

These aren’t necessarily rules of life, but I listen to all of these songs quite a bit as they definitely keep me motivated in everyday life. These songs are also all on my running playlist. If there was one thing that I couldn’t live with, it would be music. I find music very inspirational and it helps me with stress relief as well. 

Spoiler warning for the last video if you haven’t see one of my favorite movies, Never Back Down. 

Photo by RODNAE Productions from Pexels

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